Why my title is Welcome to the nut house!

Here is a brief summary of my last 2 days and you will see my nut house.

12 am Sunday- We just finished playing poker and everyone left about 12:30. Yes, I have to be at work at 7 and I still have people at my house at 12:30 on a Sunday. Anyway, Connor was stirring all night, just not sleeping right. So we get to bed watch the Apprentice, I am wired at this point and can't sleep. Finally start to doze off and Connor starts to cough so now I am laying in bed just listening to him and waiting. Then he starts to cough so much he puked. Now I have to clean up Connor and strip his crib. At this point its about 2 and we get Connor settled in our bed to sleep. My alarm goes off at 6 and we realize Connor can't go to the babysitter, he was burning up and puked again. So I call sub finder and head to school about 6:30 to do lesson plans. Well come to find out I called to late and had no substitute, so different people covered my class all day. What a mess, but that is another blog. So I take a sick day, I don't have many left since we have all been sick so much. But I get the day to cuddle with Connor, which was nice. At this point I am going stir crazy being in the house for days with all the rain we got. Brian takes Zach to school and goes to work. He comes in at 5:30 we eat dinner and then Zach is off to karate for 6. While Zach is gone, I clean up dinner give Connor his bath and play unitl Zach gets home. Zach gets home about 7:30 he does his homework and heads up for a shower. Brian plays with Connor for a little while and then at 8 we put him down. Two minutes later he climbs out and starts knocking at his door. At this point I am drained and all I want to do is take a shower and go to bed. So, Connor gets up we bring him down stairs, put him in his highchair and put on tv, not Sesame because that is what he wants. He starts to fall asleep so we try again. Doesn't work, he climbs into my bed and hides under the covers. I guess he is getting used to sleeping in our bed, not a good thing. So we try the big boy bed approach to see if he wants to sleep. Nope, that didn't work either. Now its about 9, we drag in Zach's extra mattress from his bunk bed and see if he wants to sleep with his big brother. Nice to have older kids, so they cuddle up together and lay in bed. Zach is starting to fall asleep, but Connor has this new little game he plays that if you pretend to fall asleep he screams wake up, but in Connor it sounds like it "caw caw". So of course, we he Connor screaming " caw caw" to his brother, plan d doesn't work. Zach goes off to bed and now Brian goes and lays with him and finally about 10:30 he falls asleep. What a long day. But he doesn't sleep long because by 4:30 he is up and in our bed again but of course he is not ready to sleep and is wide awake. It is hard for me to be up at 4 and fall back to sleep to be up by 6 to start my day all over again. Now its 6 am on Tuesday, I am up and out the door by 7, go to work with my crazy kids all day. It is hard to keep 60 motivated when I am ready to sleep. Especially, since they think school is done. I get done at 2:30, have a meeting til 3:15, go pick up Connor at the babysitters, about 20 minutes from my school, go get Zach at my aunts, he had a half day today, have a quick cup of coffe and head home. I get home about 4:30, get dinner ready for 5 because Brian has a meeting to go to by 6. Of, course he walks in the door at 5:15 eats dinner gets changed and heads out. Now in the mean time, Zach let the dogs out and my little one likes to get out from under our fence, so while cleaning up I stop to try and find my little white dog. I find her but she is not white any more and smells, so I stop cleaning up and go give my dog a bath. I give her a bath and finish cleaning up. Now, its time for the kids bath, I give them a bubble bath in my tub because I haven't had a chance to clean up the kids tub. They play for a little while, they love baths in my tub because its like a small pool to them. Get them out and dressed and it is now a little after 7.

I need to sit and get this out because if I don't get it out I am going to scream. Something has to give and I can't give anymore. I am so stress and am about to burst. Believe me I love my husband and my kids, but I have no quiet time or just time to sit and do nothing and hear nothing. I tell Brian he doesn't understand, if he needs quiet he can close his office door turn his cell phone off and get quiet. With my job I hear whinny, complaining, loud kids all day then have to come home to whinny, complaining, loud kids. I used to have a little quiet time when Connor went to bed at 7, but now he isn't doing that and by the time I get him to bed I am going to bed. I know Brian is doing everything possible to get his business up and running and I know he doesn't like leaving us and going to these meetings or having appointments on Saturdays, but I still take it out on him. It is hard for me to stop, because I haven't seen anything from it yet, he hasn't been able to get a paycheck yet and we need to get one soon. I know I need to stop being so moody and negative, but I just need a break. I went a couple of weeks ago for a massage, pedicure and manicure. It was suppose to be relaxing, but in the middle of it I got a phone call, when are you coming home. I need to go to the office. Thank you for interupting my two hours of peacefullness. I just have to keep telling myself, it will get better, try and stay positive, quit being so hard on Brian and just relax. Well, that made me feel a little better.